So, there was that break I took. I suppose I invited it by starting to really focus on enjoying a positive association with everything. That is how it tends to work: set yourself onto a path, and it likes to raise itself up to help you really learn how to walk it.
There has been a number of things that have carried with them their own positive association. Many of these were easier to enjoy positively because I had decided to find that open connection and foster it. I’m also now in a much better place than I was two weeks ago.
It was quite a chaotic path I took, however. So much had to be brought up for examination and worked through that I just didn’t have the words to come over and share. It was a very internal process, and it took all I had to process it all and still be there for the people here in my life.
Accepting that was part of my process, too. I knew I wasn’t coming here and posting little thoughts, and I had to accept that despite my resolution this year, it simply wasn’t time. Trying to make it “time” just because I felt obligated would have cost me for no practical purpose.
As someone recently told me, I need to learn when to be “selfish” in order to secure what I need. Well, I’ve been told that a number of times, but it’s a lesson I’m finally learning.
May this next fortnight bring me lessons on how to enjoy a smooth and rewarding ride, in a way that supports what I need without frivolously costing anyone.
Nynia in the Now 
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