I’m on the path toward reclaiming my space and time, and getting back to connecting to the ways in which I actively connect to and improve myself and my world. A lot of it was spent spinning my wheels as I was immersed into problem-solving for work and my attempt at a hobby, getting so bad that the more I tried to get out of the mud, the more mired my thoughts and work became.
My biggest breakthrough was in taking a step back and forcing myself to stop trying so hard. I learned to make myself take breaks and move at a reasonable pace, and to stop grasping so hard for “the perfect” answer so my hands could be freed up to bring about the “right” one. I think I’ve learned to be not just more effective, but also to have a more receptive perspective. I kinda feel as though I spent a couple of months in a chrysalis, so it’s time to stretch these new wings and see where they can take me.
I wanted to write down some tidbits of what I’ve learned in the past couple months of forced-contemplation and self-improvement, all I can think of to start with is snippets of a Zen story I heard years ago:
A young monk was learning how to meditate, eager to discover the deep mysteries and truths of enlightenment. Though his master had told him to center his mind on the Still Point of Nothingness, his first meditations didn’t quite go there.
“How has your practice been,” the master asked.
The monk was truly frightened, and fell to his knees to reply. “Oh Master, it was terrible! I turned my mind to meditation as you taught me, and I was beset by horrific demons whose frightening visages tormented me with the threats of hell and suffering for ten thousand years!”
The master just took a deep breath and advised the monk to ignore such distractions and keep his mind on reaching the Focus of Stillness. When he called the monk in for his interview a few days later, he inquired again about the meditation.
The monk again fell to his knees, this time in adoring awe. “Oh Master, it was so beautiful! In my mind, I saw visions of the most beautiful ascended beings, surrounding me with their dazzling glow! They spoke kindly to me, promising me the pleasures and comforts of heaven for ten thousand years!”
The master was unimpressed. With barely another breath, he advised the monk to ignore such distractions and maintain his focus on seeing the Formless Truth.
The monk respectfully postponed the next interview, and then the next, until finally at the third appointed date he arrived to again receive the master’s question.
A third time, the monk fell to his knees, more from resigned acceptance. “Master, I have no new wisdoms, no grand truths to report from my meditations. My mind drew a complete blank, and the only sensations were the cold draft and the hard floor. When I closed my eyes, I saw nothing. When I opened them, I saw nothing but a fly landing on the back of a fellow student’s shiny bald head.”
The master clapped his hands together with a broad grin, then reached down to help the monk up so he could bow to him. “Then I ask you to teach me to meditate. When I close my eyes, I still have not stilled my mind to the point of No Thought.”
Like this:
Like Loading...
Read Full Post »